BEGINNERS / A WARM-TONED FÊTE

Photos: Chris Isham; Floral and Styling: Modfete

For at least a year now I've wanted to start a blog to share projects or ideas in a more narrative format than a single Instagram photo... and today is the day! I should be excited, but instead I'm fidgeting, distracted by the stack of papers on the desk next to me. My entire to-do list suddenly looks more achievable than this tiny step into new territory: first blog post. The internal resistance takes me right back to the way I felt the first time I attempted a tiered cake. In short, uncomfortable and a little bit scared. On one side lurks the relatively certain fear that my attempts weren't (ahem, aren't) going to be beautiful and will fail my own standard of what is artistically worthy. But on the other side, oh, on the other side prowls the fear of letting fear win - of never even starting. I propose allowing the second fear to spur me on through the first, thus vanquishing them both.

The girlboss way. 

These words by Ira Glass are both assurance and motivation for a new venture: mine, or yours, whatever it may be.

"Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through." 

So sometimes creating is a disciplined slog and other times it just flows and sings, like this little fête vignette. This story is no more than "just because it is beautiful and makes us happy." That's enough.